Recently, my husband and I were driving when we noticed an older man lying on the side of the road next to his bicycle. My husband was driving, so I asked him to turn around and stop. He grumbled that the man was probably just drunk, but he stopped anyway. Meanwhile, about a dozen cars drove past. By the time we pulled over and I got out, I noticed another car turning around. There were three women inside.
It turned out that the man really was drunk. Do you know how we found out? From a woman who was raking leaves outside the house across the road. She had tried to help him get home, but eventually he fell down and went to sleep. Spoiler: he later got up and walked home.
Of the dozens of people who passed by, only women stopped to help him. And that inspired me to write this piece dedicated to women, because they don’t get nearly enough recognition for how much they do to make the world a better place.
Think back to your childhood, the holidays, traditions, and family vacations. In most cases, we owe our happy, magical memories of those moments to our mothers, grandmothers, and other female relatives. They’re the ones who decorate our homes, organise surprises, buy presents, bake Easter bread, invite guests, cook delicious meals, and make everything feel warm and welcoming. They do all of this out of their own enthusiasm.
It was my mum who stayed awake until I fell asleep so she could slip a St. Nicholas Day present under my pillow. It was my mum who came up with the idea of decorating my room for my birthday, and she and my dad would blow up balloons and make a birthday poster while I slept. It was my grandmother who invented games for me and cooked my favourite meals when I stayed with her during school holidays. It was my aunt who took me camping in Cherkasy every year. It was my cousin who supported me and often invited me out for walks when I first moved to Kyiv. It was my friend who fried potatoes for me in our dorm room while I was on my way home from work. I could think of countless examples like these, and I’m sure you could too.
I don’t know about you, but when I’m walking home alone late at night and see a group of people, I only relax if there are women among them. Four drunk guys? Everything inside me freezes. One woman among them? Phew, I can relax.
Women have never sexually harassed me at a nightclub. Women have never grabbed my butt. Women have never pretended to be seven years younger because they thought I was under 18. Women have never honked at me, made kissing noises to get my attention, or pulled up beside me on a dark street, insistently inviting me into their car. Women have never approached me at McDonald’s and asked if they could lick my feet in exchange for a burger.
I enjoy working with women more because, in most cases, they’re not only professionals but professionals with empathy. And I value empathy just as much as professional competence.
When a woman serves me in a café or shop, in my experience, she’s usually friendlier and gets things done faster, without making sleazy or inappropriate compliments. Speaking of compliments, if a woman I don’t know compliments me on the street, I’ll be on cloud nine, knowing there’s no ulterior motive behind it. If it’s a man, it’s a fifty-fifty chance.
Women are responsible and loyal. They feel a sense of responsibility towards their children, which is why they’re far less likely than men to abandon them, especially when it comes to children with disabilities. They’re less likely to leave seriously ill partners. They’re more likely to wait for their husbands to come home from prison than the other way around. Women are people you can rely on.
Even seeing this small fraction of everything women do, it hurts to think about how many obstacles they have to face. The prejudice, the endless expectations, and the way they’re treated as if they were there to perform a function rather than simply be human beings.
I want the women in this article to be seen as human beings too. I want people to understand that women aren’t always caring, strong, or any of the other things they’re expected to be. And they have every right not to be, because they’re human. They get tired, they have plenty of flaws, and they don’t always live up to expectations. And despite all that, look how much good they’ve done for each and every one of us.
There’s no need to start pointing out that men do good things too. Nobody is arguing otherwise. But this piece is about women, and women alone. So instead, take it as an opportunity to thank at least one woman who has done something good for you.
